Snowboarding

I went snowboarding for the first time Sunday and loved it (except for the lifts that I never got the hang of). I was so excited/nervous that I only slept about 3 hours. Still dark and early, Cara and I loaded up our borrowed-from-Maugenhard gear and went to pick up Micah and Chris. I wasn't sure how all 4 of us and our boards were going to fit into my average-sized sedan, but both the guys are the engineering, make-it-work type and made it work. The ride was funny. I was in my happy place- driving curves (although I spent most of the time thinking about how much more fun it would've been in a 911, R8, or something of that beautiful nature). Micah was the navigator who didn't pay much attention to Nuvi, the GPS. So Cara became the default back seat navigator. And Chris was the entertainment. We headed to Feldberg, the highest mountain in the state and just about 50 km NW of Kandern. It was wicked cold. I'm glad that Cara made me wear more layers than I wanted to.

As we stood in line--more like a throng-- for the first lift, Cara Micah and Chris talked me through some basics. Unfortunately the lesson of "don't try to sit on the lift thing; just let it pull you" didn't take. And when I tried to sit on it, I took my first spill of the day. Not painful but humbling to realize that I wasn't going to be naturally good at this. Those of you who have known me for any length of time probably know that I don't often like doing things I'm not naturally good at. So, the whole day was a very stretching, humbling, and fun one for me.

I waited at the bottom of the hill for my three friends with years of experience to greet me with "it's ok"s and "everyone falls off the lift at some point." I wanted to understand the physics of how boarding worked, so Cara and I stood behind a snowboarding class for a while so I could watch and glean. The guys got a break from me for a while and did their own thing. While Cara, ever so patiently walked backwards down the hill holding my hands while I tried different skills. What a good friend :) But after a while I asked her to leave me alone so I could make some mistakes and figure stuff out on my own.

I was equating this process to learning how to drive stick: last summer I bought a brand new manual trans without knowing how to drive it. Dad drove it to a parking lot for me, showed me the basics and rode with me for about 20 minutes. And then I kicked him out and told him I'd see him at home later. And that's when the real learning took place- while I was alone and could experiment. So Cara went on a long run by herself, and I found the wimpiest little sled run where I could test myself without someone holding my hands. I conquered the tiny hill 4 times then moved on to a real run. Everything was fine until I got to a big drop where all the cool guys were doing jumps. I freaked out and stopped myself by colliding with a padded light pole. I would've been content to lay there for a few minutes, but some man was picking me up before I'd even completely opened my eyes.

At this point I thought I had learned everything my brain could handle for one day, but Chris and Micah were not convinced. After all, the only minimally painful fall I'd had was with the sign. And how can someone learn to snowboard without some battle wounds?

So the three of us (don't know where Cara was) went to the T lifts. They talked me through it as we waded through the throng. I was so nervous! Chris went first to show me what to do. And Micah went with me- telling me before we got on, "just stand there and I'll do everything." The only thing I had to do was stand, and what did I do? I'm not really sure, but it wasn't standing because we fell. But Micah's the man and somehow pulled me back on. We ended up making it all the way, but with every bump he reminded me, "you're ok. Just keep standing."

Now atop, I imagined putting on my motorcycle helmet and barreling down the mountain taking out small children along the way. After all, my biggest fear was hitting my face on something and repeating last year's facial/teeth injuries. But if I'd had my helmet, I'm not sure what I would've been scared of.

But given that my helmet is currently in my parent's garage, I was a whiny, scared little girl. But Chris and Micah were so great. Chris would explain some skill, do it, then plop down in the snow about 25 feet away. Then Micah would pep talk me into trying it, following right behind me. This went on for a long time. I felt bad for those guys going so slowly with me when I bet they just wanted to fly down. But I was the only one complaining. Poor guys ;) I wouldn't have had the patience to put up with me. Every time I fell they sat down and waited for me to get the nerve to try again.

We finally made it down, found Cara, breaked for some food, then went back out to the same devil T lifts as before. Cara and Chris went first. Then Micah (again telling me to JUST STAND) and me. We didn't make it very far. But once again, he still had one arm gripping the bar and the other around me. They stopped the lift, and just as we were almost back on, they started it up... and we were dragged until my board somehow flipped sideways and got stuck in his. I really wish I could've watched us looking like a pretzled car wreck. It was funny from my perspective, but I bet it was hilarious to the people right behind us.

Somehow he talked me into trying it again, although I made him promise that he'd go without me if we fell again. After a brief initial slip up, we made it almost all the way up! Because Micah was busy getting me on the lift and telling me to JUST STAND!! he didn't actually get on the T. And his back foot wasn't on the step grip thing. So when we hit a bump near the top, we went flying. Again, Micah was my hero and very patient with me, following down behind me, encouraging me to get up when I fell, and pulling me up when I didn't want to.

All in all, it was a great day, and I am so thankful to have had such patient teachers. I didn't really get hurt, only ran into 1 person and 1 pole, and kept tackling the lifts despite falling every time. I consider that a mostly successful day :)

1019

When words are many, sin is not absent,
but he who holds his tongue is wise.
Proverbs 10:19

I love when God brings righteous conviction through watching someone else lead his or her normal life. A verse that has been a 2x4 to my mind and heart for the last several years is Prov 10:19. I can justify running my mouth as venting, asking for advice, or even asking for prayer. But it is probably the most obvious sign of my human depravity.

Recently, I was challenged and encouraged by a friend who apologized for something she said to me about someone else several months ago. I really wanted to thank her for the reminder, but I was afraid she would interpret that as cynically meaning "thanks for making me feel guilty for what I just said 5 minutes ago. I'll be sure to watch what I say around you." So I just smiled, thanked her for being obedient to repent, and made a mental note to emulate her as she emulates Christ.

Because I want to be glorifying Christ and not flaunting my old sinful nature, I've been studying the ways in which we sin with our tongues. And let me tell you, there are so many more ways than just lying...

Lying is an obvious misuse of the tongue. Prov 25:18 says a man who lies is like a sword or sharp arrow. Prov 6:17 states the Lord hates lying- that a liar will be broken beyond repair. Flattery in Psalm 5:9 comes from the open tomb of a throat, leading to inward destruction. Those are harsh words to be paired with flattery. Words of flattery (not to be confused with genuine compliments, but trite platitudes) in Psalm 12:3 also go along with proud words. David prays that the Lord "cut off all flattering lips and the tongue that speaks proud things." The overused tongue in Ecclesiastes 5:2-3 sounds all too familiar to me:

"Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. As a dream comes when there are many cares, so the speech of a fool when there are many words."

Sometimes when I'm talking I can hear how foolish I sound, but the words just keep spilling out along with my pride. I argue with myself: maybe if I keep going I'll be able to recover and fix all this.

God says in Prov. 18:13 that folly and shame are his who has a swift tongue and speaks before he listens. We should, instead, "be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry" (Jas 1:19). The backbiting tongue of Prov 25:23 "brings angry looks" and is in the same category as murder, hatred of God, and "every kind of wickedness" in Romans 1:29-31. Gossip is a poison that "goes down to a man's inmost parts" according to Prob 18:8. Cursing similarly "enters into the body like water" and can be retained as a garment that one wears all the time (Psalm 109:17-19).

"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing" (Prov 12:18). This verse is different than the others because it contrasts the wickedness of the tongue to its potential for being instrumental for good; it can heal too! The tongue can be used for good too: for glorifying God, edifying and encouraging one another, for teaching, correcting, rebuking, singing, praying, etc.


Who knew the tongue could wear so many hats? Lies, flattery, pride, overuse, swift, backbiting, gossip, cursing, and recklessness.

"The tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts... it is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be." Jas 3:5-9

Please pray for me as I try to submit my words to Christ. I want to be exude truth and wisdom, not the poison I've been so quick to pour into my soul and others.

By the way, in my research of the tongue, I learned that crocodiles can't move their tongues.

First thing's first

Recently someone asked me what the first thing is that I would do when I went back to the States. I didn't have an answer then. But looking back now (I've been on American soil for a few hours), the first thing I did here that I wouldn't have done in Germany was to tell a joke to a stranger.

I'm quieter and more reserved in Germany- kind of dull really without the ability to connect with people through wise cracks. It was so nice to look around Detroit and soak up the confidence that came with seeing a sea of people that I could effectively communicate with. Ahh, the motherland.

I'm waiting for my flight from Detroit to Dallas but am happy to report that I haven't gotten sick yet!! I only slept for 3 hours last night, so I was able to sleep through most of the train ride from Basel to Frankfurt this morning. Then when I got to the airport, I met the love of my life... not really, but he was an excellent flight attendant. First of all, this German man thought I was German (which always makes me feel good and boosts my language confidence). When I found my seat, he asked if I planned on sleeping most of the time. When I answered yes, he asked the man sitting next to me if he'd like to move to another seat a few rows away. The dude followed the suggestion, then my attendant friend came back and told me that now I could stretch out between three seats and wished me pleasant dreams. That made all the difference. I slept through one of the snacks. When I awoke, he showed up with chocolate ice cream in hand, telling me he set some aside for me. And then, when there were some problems that had our plane going in circles for a while, and we landed 4 minutes after my next flight took off, he called and rebooked a ticket for this evening, which was hand delivered as soon as I got off the plane...along with a voucher for a free meal, some frequent flyer miles, and a discount coupon for my next flight. Nice! Who says money can't buy love?

One more flight, and then I get to be with Asha! Yay!!

True Friendship

Jafer, Asha & Me 2003.

I know a friendship is real when I can invite myself to someone's bachelorette party and bridal shower... and invite myself to stay at that person's apartment and be chauffeured to and from the airport at last minute's notice... and know that they would be ECSTATIC about it all!!!

That's my Asha :)

Ashaface, my best friend and college roommate, is getting married on Jan 16th, and unfortunately I can't go. So when she told me Monday that her parties were this weekend, you can imagine my excitement as I dreamed of crashing it!

So I busted tail Monday and Tuesday to get a week's worth of work done, bought my train and plane tickets today, and am headin out at 4:30 tomorrow morning!

I should be packing, sleeping, finishing up some work stuff, writing cards that I intend to mail from the States or getting together my 80s outfit for the party. But instead I'm watching Prison Break, eating Heath bars and penning odes in my mind about my love for Ashley as I reel in excitement.

Asha likes milk chocolate, and I like dark. Asha likes standing on desks when she doesn't get enough attention, and I like trying to knock her down. Asha loves her male family members...and so do I :) Asha likes doing hair, and I like having mine done. Asha likes to sip coffee, wear man pajama pants and read a book with her cats for days on end... then take a random trip to Vegas. I like to down my hot chocolate while tormenting her cats, and then take a random trip to New York. Asha likes to do silly things when she is "Shmashley," and I enjoy laughing at and taking care of her. Asha likes Gilmore Girls, and I like Prison Break. She likes Eloise and poetry, and I like soccer and fixing things. Basically, what I'm trying to say is, Ashley, you complete me. hahaha, just kidding. I know I could never compete with Frank the Tank.

Maybe I will write a list of remember whens on the flight. Like, remember when we threw the mattress out the fourth floor window? Or the day we became "blood sisters" after a wrestling match on concrete? Or when we listened to the animaniacs "nations of the world" song on repeat...in collge? :)

Ashaface is a true friend, and for her I am very thankful. It's too bad that we live on different continents and that she's about to become one of "those people"-- married ones who only hang out with couples, that is. Hmm, on second thought, are all your male family members married off?

Ok, it's 8pm and I haven't packed a thing. Time to go raid a girl's dorm for 80s gear.

Me and Asha 2003-4ish

Productivity

It's amazing how much work one can accomplish when they stay at it for 19.5 hours. I've been working for days to enter all the students' flight information for Christmas break into a database that can spit out very useful reports, but distractions and projects kept taking precedence- the urgent over the important. So I decided today to work through the night and take off part of the day tomorrow. And whalah! It's 3:30am and it's mostly done! And by mostly done I mean I have done everything I can to organize those 1103 flights in the system without waking up some kids to ask them questions.

I'm so excited and relieved to finally have this huge chunk of my job squared away that now I can't sleep. I want to keep being productive! I tried laying on the floor for about 2 whole minutes then gave up on being able to shut my mind off anytime soon. So I did some nonograms (the silly little puzzles Nate got me addicted to), and my time was better than when I'm rested and such. Strange.

If I were in the States, I'd go grocery shopping then start cooking for Thanksgiving. But not only is everything closed in the little burb of Kandern, but I'm also locked in the school until 6am...Supposedly in an effort to discourage people from being workaholics, the sensors in the locks are changed so that people can't get in or out during the late night/ early morning. Then they just get people like me who stay the whole duration. Eh... oh well. I've got all day tomorrow to shop, cook, and move my bedroom back downstairs... unless I can figure out how to make the heater in my bedroom work. Literally, Monday night Cara and I were talking in my bedroom, and it was so cold we could see our breath!

So, everyone who has been asking why I am so happy to have my new sweatpants, there's the answer. My bedroom is the artic tundra... and because they make me want to run and slide across a smooth floor.

Just some thoughts

There's not much funnier than listening to middle school boys trying to figure out if a girl likes them or not. (My office is in the stairwell between the middle school floors, so I'm privy to these kinds of conversations)

I think it's impossible for me to savor chocolate. I've been practicing not chewing and making them last longer. But I never make it past about 40 seconds. I just don't have that kind of self-control.

Today I felt very European walking the cobblestone streets in my pointy, knee-high boots with swirly tights sticking out the top, and having various oversized accessories. Next on the list: learning 5 other languages and dying my hair funny colors.

I just realized yesterday how much more entertaining it makes calling various embassies if I call ones other than in America or Germany. I hear those accents all the time, but yesterday I got to listen to British, Scottish and Aussie as well!

Sometimes I justify early morning naps to myself by saying I need to warm up the day's clothes by holding them under my pile of warm blankets for a while before putting them on.

Country music makes me miss the States more than any other genre.

I've noticed I get grumpy when I don't eat enough green, leafy vegetables. Good thing I like spinach enough to eat it everyday.


An finally for now, Christmas break at BFA starts in 29 days!

Books

People, I need some new books to read. Suggestions? Fiction or non. Really, I'm open to anything except the Christian romance novels in which they fall in love and get married the next day. Those sweep me up then drop me on my butt when they're done. Please let me know of any intellectually stimulating things you've read that you think I might enjoy.

Here are a few photos from Sonne's thanksgiving celebration last week and the prettiest flowers I've ever received. I didn't get any pictures of the meal or even the nice spread, because well, I didn't want to miss out on the rolls. But here are some post-meal dogpiles. There was blood.

Daintiness

When I came back to work Monday morning, I was expecting a few hundred emails in my inbox since I didn't check it a dozen times a day over the weekend to keep things to my 25-to-respond-to max like usual. But to my surprise, there were none- not even any spam! The server went down over the weekend, and the IT guys have been able to get all the accounts except for two up and running. If a tree is going to drop an acorn in a crowd, it will be on my head. If a drunk driver is going to hit any car, it will be mine. If 1 person in 10 million is going to have a reaction to a flu shot and face plant into the floor, it's me. And if any account is going to be dysfunctional in our server of hundreds of staff, students, and parents, apparently it will be mine too.

After two days of limited productivity at work, Kristi told me to "rest" today if my email still wasn't working. So I am. And it has been wonderful. The goal of today was to have a quality date with our God and thus regain my sense of daintiness.

I realize that probably sounds silly, but spending time in the Word, prayer, journaling, and just being still with God make me feel protected, and well...dainty. God and I mulled a lot of things over today, but here's something He challenged and encouraged me with, Hebrews 6. 9-12:

But, beloved, we are confident of better things concerning you, yes, things that accompany salvation, though we speak in this manner. For God is not unjust to forget your work and labor of love which you have shown toward His name, in that you have ministered to the saints, and do minister. And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence to the full assurance of hope until the end, that you do not become sluggish, but imitate those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.

He is telling me, his beloved treasure, that He has good things in store for me, as if salvation isn't already enough and infinitely more than I deserve! He sees my work and the things I do in love for Him and for the missionary families that I'm currently serving. He is faithful. He sees my efforts even when I face disappointment and discouragement from those around me. He wants me to be diligent and not fall prey to the discouragement.

As I read and prayed through that passage, I could feel his shield going up around me. I have let myself be dragged down by disappointments these past few weeks and forgot that I had a stinkin big and strong Shield in front of me the whole time. I do not have to fight on my own, which is wonderful because it's really tiring, and I'm a weak little thing. "For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." Amen. Thus, I once again feel dainty and protected. My Shield has been there all along, I just forgot and have been peering around it's edge for too long.

Actually, after my date this morning, I felt so light and taken care of that I came home, turned on The Penguins, danced around for a bit, then tried on the only little black dress I brought to Germany. But when I looked in the mirror, I saw all the soccer scars on my legs and suddenly felt out of place in my own skin. What I was feeling on the inside didn't match the outside; just because God did some quality mending work on my heart this morning didn't mean he would take away my physical scars. And that's ok.

So, with my new found inner daintiness, I ditched the dress and heels and got the sweats back out and set to work on insulating the house, tending to the yard, working on the car, and rearranging furniture. I probably don't look too dainty right now, but I am so thankful that God is the keeper of my heart and that even as I strengthen my body and handy-woman skills, He is continually tending to my heart.

More than Mr. Jones

Friends are addicting, and fun is my drug of choice. The problem with drugs is the crash after you quit. I’ve had a lot of fun the last few weekends; they are what got me through the weeks. But as I laid in bed this morning trying to talk myself into parting ways with my mound of warm blankets to welcome another cold day, it hit me that I have no more “fun” activities planned. Nothing at all. There are hypothetical things like hopefully some day I’ll get to snowboard, hopefully something fun will happen during my three weeks of Christmas break, or hopefully I’ll go back to the States sometime next year. But there’s nothing concrete- nothing to look forward to and make paper chains to help me count down the days. I would choose excitement over a nice, calm peace most any day, but excitement for me requires other people. Yes, I could go snowboarding by myself, hop on an easyjet and go to Glasgow for Christmas then Prague for New Years and make friends with strangers. I can go to sporting events by myself or get dressed up and go out. I can do the things I want to do, but really, where is the fun in making memories by yourself (or with people you’ll never see again)? My fun comes in seeing fun on the faces of those I love.

I like BFA. I like my job. But neither in nor of themselves are “fun.” This is hard, draining work, but it is GOOD work. I am not Sarah when sitting in an office shuffling papers and answering phones. I am Frau Haymond. Going back to my thoughts on Sarahness from a while back… Sarah needs to stretch her lungs, be sassy, get out and play, and take care of people… but I just feel so broken right now. I can’t carry on a conversation with anyone, can’t do silly dances, can’t make people laugh. Mir ist kaputt.

I went to visit Denton this weekend in Lausanne and feel pretty bad for him having to put up with me in my somber state. I really wanted to be fun and charming, but the more I tried, the emptier I felt. So, thanks D, for putting up with my crap. Poor guy... he’s too good to me.

The sermon at his church was about how God works through processes. I don’t know what kind of process I’m in—maybe realizing how much I crave relationships and how much more effective I am when with others—but I’m definitely in a process of some sorts. Several weeks ago, Mari Ellen asked me if I need people, to which I replied “no…not really.” And although I still stand by that— that I do not need people to live— I do need people to keep me shiny. Without others challenging me and encouraging the aforementioned “Sarahness,” I turn into a dull penny. When I’m alone for a long time, I stare at walls (aka Mr. Jones) and selfishly turn my thoughts inward. But when I’m with others, I can think about how to serve and love them (except Denton because homeboy doesn’t know how to let anyone do anything for him). So, I’m thankful for the friends God has given me and for their willingness to let me love them. Just while typing this, even, Timmy, Alyssa, Kristi, and Cara all came by to talk life. I like that. They are great. I do need people.

Anything but Normal

Today was definitely anything but normal. The goal for the morning was to drive to Basel and buy train tickets for a student to go home tomorrow. But then came the request... "since you're going to Basel anyway and you speak German, how would you feel about picking up the science department's shipment that is stuck in customs at the airport?" Sure.

So at 9:30, Kristi hopped into my car and we headed to the Basel train station. Tickets from my favorite ticket salesman who reminds me of Mr Bean. Hot chocolate from Starbucks. A solid, uneventful start...then came the fun...trying to figure out how to get 3 boxes of black insect pins and amoeba slides out of customs. We found the airport and drove around in a few circles trying to follow the directions that were given to us that went like this "if you're coming from the city, you'll get to a traffic circle. Right after 100m by the casino. Tollstrasse. Cargo (not terminal). Look for a four story building that says FRET" (French for freight, although we wanted the Swiss side).

Whoever gave these directions to the guy who gave them to me should never give directions again. But Kristi has hawk eyes and saw FRET from probably a km away. A few more circles later we found our way to the locked-down building. So we went to the open building next door that had a Frachthalle sign outside. They sent us toward the locked down building. There was no way in. We must have looked pathetic standing in the huge parking lot full of UPS trucks and semis because some French speaker swiped his badge and pushed us through one of those turny-gates and into the world of FRACHT/FRET. He escorted us to the office of a man who spoke German who sent us through the intimidating warehouse double doors and to an office of another French speaker. She directed us to an office on the first floor. The lady upstairs took our money and explained that we needed to go to another office on the second floor, then the third floor, then back down to the warehouse except around the corner by the big ramp.

So we ventured to the second floor into another world of French (ahh!). Luckily the guy spoke enough (heavily French accented) German for us to communicate. And another hour and sum of money later we were on to the third floor. I handed them the stack of papers we'd collected from the lower two floors, and no one in that office seemed to know what they were or what to do with them. They advised us to not claim anything at the border and just "put the things in the back and hope you don't get stopped." They gave us whatever stamp we needed and moved us on to the warehouse...back to the little office we saw at the beginning. I signed some French papers, then the lady shooed us away... through the doors, to the right, at the end another right, through the other doors like these. We follow the instructions, laughing at the fact that we were just walking around these "highly secured" loading docks as if we ran the joint. I wanted to throw some boxes in the back of a truck just for the heck of it. But we continued.

We rounded the corners and found the doors, opened them and TAA-DAA! The French woman who had just given us directions on the other side of the warehouse was right there unloading our boxes. She must be a ninja to be that quick. I signed some more papers in French (even though we were supposedly on the Swiss, and therefore, German-speaking side). The man told us to stop at customs in Weil to "get money back." We were thoroughly confused since the people upstairs said go and hope you don't get caught, and now this guy is telling us to intentionally stop for our money back.

So, Kristi picked up the body-sized box, and I grabbed to two smaller ones. We started across the parking lot back toward the car and soon realized that we were trapped like rats in a cage! Where was our nice French man to swipe us back out of the compound?! We were standing by a place where cars could exit after a lady in the booth swiped their card and raised the traffic arm for them when some funny man drove by saying "hey what's up?" then motioned for us to walk behind his car as he drove through. But... we got caught. Apparently two giggling girls carrying a 5-ft long box isn't very sneaky.

It worked out to our advantage this time that the lady only spoke French. After asking us a few questions and us just staring dumbfoundedly or answering in other languages, she told us to just go. Yay! We could see the car!

There were probably about 100 men standing outside and maybe 5 women... it looked like a jail, or the military. We got stared at A LOT. I'm not sure if it's because we were trekking through the parking lot of semis or if we just are that attractive, but we'll choose the latter.

So, let's see. I made another wrong turn. The Swiss border at Weil was empty, so I stopped at the German side and asked him what to do with the papers to get money back. He sent us back into Switzerland and through another checkpoint, a place booming with business. As we approached the border, we had three lanes to choose from: the first was for cars with autobahn stickers, the second was for cars without stickers, and the third had a picture of a truck and said IMPORT. Kristi chimed in with the enthusiasm of a 5 year old, "let's be a truck!!" So I drove into the line of semis. We were importing, afterall.

The booth in which the customs worker sits in considerably elevated since the line is meant for semis. So when it was our turn at the booth, I had to get out of my squatty little car, stand on my toes and was still just barely tall enough to slide my papers into the slot for the lady. I could not stop laughing at how funny it must have looked. I looked around, and indeed, there were multiple people staring and laughing. The lady sent us away to "number 3." So I drove into lane number three...which ended at an empty booth with another traffic arm. So I backed up and drove the wrong direction until I could park in the truckers lot.

We went inside to a building full of little booths, like a row of bank tellers, except with a thick plastic partition between the employees and "guests-"one side of 12 Swiss windows and 12 German on the other side. A very outgoing man greeted us while we stared at the windows trying to decide where to go; I showed the German man our papers, and he said "Oh Black Forest! We have some Africans!!" He disappeared and came back with 2 Africans in tow. I guess they were to help with translation, although the man didn't give them an opportunity to speak, and after a few moments, he sent us to the Swiss side.

The Swiss guy looked comfused by our papers, asked to see our car, but when he realized we parked all the way down by the trucks instead of in the logical parking lot right next to the building he said that was good enough and went back inside. He gave us another paper to add to our stack and sent us "outside, around the corner, you'll get money back there." We followed the directions, met another person who looked at our papers as if he'd never seen anything like it before, and sent us to someone else who gave us our Swiss import fee back and sent us back inside to the Germans. While waiting for an available window on the German side, some man told us we had to go back to the Swiss side first. So we did. They stamped some more stuff and kept some of the papers, then sent us to the German windows. The Germans didn't know what to do with the papers and after the guy helping us had asked all the others in his little cubicle area some questions, he gave us some more stamps and a token to get out of the trucker parking lot.

Like the initial booth at this border, the token machine to raise the arm was also made for semis. Kristi took a picture of me on my toes, arm fully extended trying to get the token into the slot. I jumped back in and raced off in an effort to beat the arm coming back down. Finally free!

On the way back to school we also saw an old man literally stop in the middle of the street to check his watch. As if Kristi and I hadn't laughed enough, that was the icing on the cake for how ridiculous our morning was. So... 4.5 hours later we were back at school with the insects, amoebas, train tickets and empty Starbucks cups.

Being Genuine

Happy Sunday. Today I craved some church time in English. I've been going to FeG, a German church in Kandern, for two primary reasons: to practice German and to make friends that are not also BFA coworkers. It has definitely served those purposes. I understand most of the services and have joined a small group and made some friends. But today I wanted to know that I understood the sermon... all of it... so I had home church and listened to Pastor Dave's sermon called "Be Genuine" from a few weeks ago at CFC.

The main point was that it is easier to practice religion than to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.

Take heed that you do not do your charitble deeds before men, to be seen by them. Otherwise you have no reward from your Father in heaven. Matt 6.1

So this got me thinking about the condition of my heart- what I do that is practicing religion instead of loving God. And when I serve if I'm doing that out of genuine love for God and those I'm serving or if it's mixed in with some selfish desire to be noticed. I want so badly to be genuine- that everything I say and do be in response to Christ and not at all to impress others. But I'm a prideful and self-exalting person; so maybe I should just stop talking :] When words are many, sin is not lacking, right?

It also makes me think about what I do out of obligation and what I do because I want to. For example, people expected me to be at FeG this morning, but if I had gone, that would have been the only reason why- to fulfill the expectations of others'. So I had a good time in the Word at home and prayed that next week I will have a legitimate desire to fellowship with others.

Just to clarify, there is an English-speaking church at BFA called BFCF, but I've learned that I can't be there and not work. I want to meet with other believers for the purpose of growing closer to God while encouraging and being encouraged- not doing things to get a head start on the work week.

Love God. Love people. Serve. Be peacemakers. And be genuine in all of it. Wouldn't that be incredible?

Disclaimer

I suppose I should offer a disclaimer to all future roommates: I like to stretch my lungs :)

Katie just came and shut my door because she said we were having a battle of country and hymns. Apparently Josh Turner and I were winning because I didn't even know there was a battle.

Being cooped up in an office makes me need to be loud and active. And because I don't have the energy to go running tonight (sick again...), singing and dancing around my living room is the outlet of choice. But man, I would love to two step the night away. I wonder if honky tonks exist in Europe. I'll add that to my list of things to find/do. Already on the list are Sanssouci, snowboarding, a girls night in Prague, going to the baths, not being freaked out by video Skype, losing my voice at a Euro/Worldcup game, mastering the train system, and being swept off my feet in Glasgow.

Someday I will do those things. Right now, I know I'm stretching myself too thin, but I've also never been more compassionate and loving than God is making me right now. When things hurt the students hearts, it hurts mine, too. One of the guys had something written on his arm (in his own, made up language) that he heard during chapel a few weeks ago that has stuck with him and me:

BREAK MY HEART WITH WHAT BREAKS YOURS.

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

It has been great to connect with others enough to be broken hearted with what breaks theirs, but I crave being able to have that identification with Christ. I want to know His heart so well that it moves me to God glorifying thoughts, feelings and actions. I want us to resonate. And, I want to love as fiercely as He does. How in the world does one love fiercely? I'm not too sure, but I'm willing to bet that that is a prayer God would willing answer- Abba, teach me to love like You do... to love fiercely.


Side note... Josh Turner is pretty... and so is his voice.

In Christ Alone

In Christ alone my hope is found;
He is my light, my strength, my song;
This cornerstone, this solid ground,
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My comforter, my all in all—
Here in the love of Christ I stand.

Exhale

I've written three drafts of blogs over the last several weeks that I never actually posted. So instead of posting the out-dated stories, I'll just recap a bit.

I've been without Ted at work for about a month now. Here are before and after pictures of the office.

I went on a great hike in the Alps several weeks ago. You know the song from Cinderella "so this is love....mmmmm....mmmm...?" That's how I feel about the Alps. Being there was such a great getaway time for me and God. Here are some pictures.

Two weeks ago I was missing five points (my favorite spot in Birmingham AL). I spent the weekend reading The Shack (which I would love to discuss with anyone else who has read it) and found myself wishing to be sitting in downtown Birmingham around the busyness of people instead of sitting alone on my picturesque balcony in Germany. A few days later, I went to Loerrach (where I go to the various government offices every few days) just to explore the city and had such a great time with God. I don't even know how to articulate what was so special about it, but I felt like I was on a date--just the level of intimacy and excitement I had talking things over with God. Very cool. And then it was a cherry on top when I realized that the place I had been sitting for a quite a while was where five roads converge and people mill around... five points Loerrach. I felt like God was giving me a little gift.

This past Sunday I went to some castle ruins in Staufen with the Winslows (fellow BFAers) and their friend/might as well be son, Denton. It was gorgeous, but my favorite thing was making a nonBFA friend who has a similar sense of humor. It was so refreshing to not be asked questions about visas, taxes, and travel arrangements!This week was the first time I've felt overwhelmed in this job. It hit me one morning that it was not physically possible fo me to get everything done that needed to be done. So I belted out a few verses of "In Christ Alone" and asked for patience with myself. Not everything I wish could've been done got done, but life goes on.

Wed, Thurs and Friday were tough for sure with the weight of the things that weren't getting done. So today I vegged...all day in my sweats, ate a whole pizza by myself, watched a movie, laughed a lot with my new complicated friend Denton, and it was exactly what I needed. I fell short on my laughing quota this week, so I had to make up the deficit today.

So, right now, things are good. After a few days of holding my breath, I'm finally exhaling. There is a lot of work to do this week, but it's a 4 day week!! No school Friday. And I get to go to Herbstmesse (like Evansville's Fall Festival) next weekend. Bring on the festival foods.

Behind

I am behind in blogging. My computer was mostly dead but is now mostly back to life. There are many things I want to tell and pictures to show. My camping trip in the Alps, before and after pictures of my office, and the incredible ways I'm being stretched...But for now, I just went to my first German small group (studying Romans in German, ah!), and I loved it. Something funny though: I can't say my own name in German. They don't have the same "r" sound as in "Sarah," and my attempts at learning to roll my "r"s over the last 8 years have been in vain. Schade. Too bad.

A Relaxed Evening

Tonight is the first night that I've been home (and awake) in a few weeks. I haven't felt like myself lately; so I'm making a conscious effort to get back to Sarahness. My boss-friend Kristi pointed out that I don't goof off as much as I used to, and that's sad because silly = fun. I've also not been spending quality time in the Word, working out, cooking, reading, telling silly stories, dancing, playing soccer, singing at full volume, having one-on-one conversations and prayer time with people...basically the things that make me happy. I don't really know what I have been doing that has taken up so much time...working I guess? I really enjoy working, but not having stuff outside of work makes a pretty sad life. So, anyone who reads this, please take this confession as a request to keep me accountable.

Since Saturday I've made time in the Word and prayer priority.
Working out: I went for a pretty humbling jog today and seriously thought about lifting
Cooking: I made a pizza... it's a start. Better than just bread and chocolate.
Reading: I tried tonight but just couldn't get into the only genres I had on hand
Telling silly stories: Yep, definitely haven't told any stories lately :(
Dancing: I did lots of that over the weekend while by myself in the Sonne laundry room
Soccer: haven't played in weeks...maybe Sunday night if not too tired from a weekend of hiking
Singing: I just took a break from typing this so I could belt out some tunes, so I could write that I'd done it. Life feels constricted without stretching the lungs once in a while.
One-on-one conversations and prayer: I'm trying to engage people in real conversations and am asking for specific prayer requests from people. I feel like I get to talk with God about my friends more than I get to talk with my friends about God. I'm not sure if that's good...or if that's just the nature of the busyness beast of BFA.

As you can see, I'm working on getting back to me and living a meaningful life worthy of the calling. Friends, please check up on me every once in a while to help keep me on track to being a healthy, well-rounded person.

Lessons from Sonne

I got to spend the weekend at one of the guys' dorms, Sonne (I have already gotten an earfull from the Maugenhard family). And I count myself blessed to have been able to work with the staff and hang out with those great guys. I'm going to try to articulate the immediate lessons I learned from the staff members.

The first lesson came from Tommy. I really respect his wisdom in keeping things private that should stay so. "When words are many, sin is not lacking. But he who holds his tongue is wise." He knows how to deal with people appropriately and speaks with grace and wisdom!

The next lesson came from Sharon. When I got to the dorm Friday night, there were a ton of things to be done for the boys. So after we prayed together, she delegated the work to me so that she could have time in the Word. She recognized that it was more important to take care of the condition of her heart than to do the running around stuff. Very Mary-Martha. Very cool.

The conviction stick was wieled by the Spirit in Andy, unbeknownst to him. When asked why I live the way I do, I gave a shallow, earthly (although legitimate!) answer, to which he replied, "is that it?" Line drive to the chest. The question stuck with me throughout the day, and I rolled it around as I rolled cookie dough. The decision to live a "good life" during and after college was made from a mostly shallow thought process that went something like "the type of man I want to marry deserves someone better than me, so I'd better straighten up so he likes me when he comes around." Although that's a valid decision, it's not enough. That puts way too much emphasis of my significance in that relationship instead of in Christ. So, I once was living for the approval of man, but now I live for glorifying God. Andy wasn't trying to convict me, but that's the Spirit working through him.

And, finally, CB. From her I learned about boundaries, a prerequisite for being the only single female in a guys' dorm. During a campfire, the boys wanted to have manly bonding time- haha, which I guess just means taking off their shirts in the freezing cold. And despite my saying "what's the big deal!? If you want to take your shirts off, take them off! I don't care," they waited until CB and I left. As we were leaving she told me that she instilled a shirts-on policy for the guys when she's around. Not only do I respect that that is important to her, I respect that she has communicated that to them well enough that they respect her wishes even with another adult saying the opposite.

I definitely feel blessed and challenged by my time in the dorm. It's a bit sad to come home to quietness and just cooking and doing laundry for one, but I've got plenty to think and pray about now. So, thank you to Tommy, Sharon, Andy, and CB for challenging and encouraging me just by being yourselves. And thank you for trusting me with your Sonne fellas.

Much love for a Spirit-filled weekend with Sonne boys and staff.

Also, everyone who has been to my apartment has said something about the tiny little spiral staircase that goes up to my room. We all knew it was just a matter of time until I went tumbling down, and today was that day. My teeth are still in my head, so I'm ok!

The girls at Laura's not-so-surprising birthday party

My new room!

The curtains chose the floor over hanging on the wall one night while I was sleeping.

I would like a life-size cutout of Lucky the Leprechaun to put on that little attic door.

And they said Germany didn't have closets...

One of the more random facets of my job is ordering mass quantities of peanut butter and brown sugar that is imported from Holland. I put one of the 10kg "pales" of peanut butter next to my laptop for size reference. At Laura's party, see picture of beautiful ladies above, Laura and I stirred and divided up this pale of separated natural peanut butter. And we only broke one huge cooking spoon in the process!

I love the RAs

Before coming to Germany, people told me that moving overseas would teach me things about myself. Here's what I've learned: I am much more extroverted than I ever knew. I always knew I was energized by being with people, but now, I crave being with people! And the RAs have been so wonderful. Today 3 of them came by my office & 2 left a "love note" (females) on my car. Aww... It's a good combination that when they get time off they need a place to go and that I have a place and love people using it! The last several Mondays (the day they get off every week), people have been at my apartment with and without me there- which makes me really happy to know that they are comfortable enough with me to know that I like them being there even when I'm not. And this weekend I got to hang out with the guys that had the whole weekend off. It was so nice to spend some time with Y chromosomes. Friday we got Doner (*meat happy dance*) and watched a movie. Saturday we spent a leisurely hot chocolate afternoon at a cafe and went to Freiburg for Mexican! Then another movie and some good talk time. So wonderful, but now I recognize what it is I miss most about the United States...not my family (I'm sorry! I love you all!!!), not food, not being able to laugh at jokes...I miss having guy friends. I'm not sure why I can't seem to make solid connections here, but just trying to have a real conversation with most leaves me feeling like they think I'm trying to flirt with them (does that make sense?). And the few that I have been able to have meaningful conversation with have been subject to the wagging tongues of destructive joking and gossip. So right now, I'm bummed. I have some excellent girlfriends here, but I feel lop-sided without my guys around to balance out life. Please pray for some quality friendships.

The Embassy Adventure

Once upon a time my friends Lane and Michelle realized a few days before their visas were to expire that they were completely out of pages in their passports and could thus not get new visas before going to an embassy to get pages added. Unfortunately, things at their dorm have been a bit crazy and a day trip to the embassy was difficult to plan. When Lane finally created the opportunity, he drove a couple hours to the embassy with both their passports as well as a few of the students who were in the same predicament. Embassy denied his request since he was not the power of attorney for any of the passports. So he drove back home, a day wasted, only to break the bad news to an already overwhelmed wife who just wanted the mess to be done.

So the next day I went to the embassy with letters of "power of attorney" in hand for all of the passports. I thought the embassy closed at noon and was traveling quickly down the autobahn to get there asap. I ended up getting into the city about 10:45am- gas light going on as I went into city limits. Found the embassy and proper parking garage- no problems until I tried to walk out of the parking garage the way I drove in. But there were no doors! I had come in through a censored door that closed behind me. I looked around, saw no exit signs, felt totally stupid, cursed the unrelenting doors and proceeded to run through the parking garage like a crazy woman. Some man found man and must have recognized the panic expression on my face and said something like, "you look like you need a friend." I think I said something really classy like "or a door out of this place!" He befriended me by showing me the exit. Too bad it put me out on the wrong side of the building with fences all around. So...basically, it took me about 10 minutes to find the other side of the stinkin building. I asked 2 people for directions, and they both gave me directions to the old embassy in French. I knew it was the wrong place because the directions were way too long and involved busses. One lady scoffed at me when I tried to explain that that was the wrong embassy as if saying you're the one who asked for directions.

But I got there. Running. I enter and the woman nonchalantly asks, "are those all yours passports?" Yes! All 8! With 8 different names! Whew, I tried not to be sarcastic since I was asking her to process 8 passports in an hour's time. I waited an hour taking note of how many American passport holders don't speak a lick of English. After a while I started guessing what kind of accent people would have based on how they were dressed. Sometimes I was right, some wrong. But my favorite guy of the whole day strolled in wearing an all white suit. Security guard asked him to remove his belt and SNAP! It was like lightning! And immediately "Billy Jean" by Michael Jackson started playing on the soundtrack in my head. I laughed aloud. I'm not sure why that song apparently goes with my stereotype of that guy, but who am I to fight the music playing in my head?

Noon rolled around and the nice embassy lady told me that they hadn't started working on my 8 passports because their computers were down, but to come back at 2:00. She'd tell the guards to let me straight in. I was excited! Special treatment from embassy people is always nice!

I got quite bored walking in circles. Switzerland is too expensive to buy the fun European shoes I've been seeing about, but I found a big sports store that kept my attention for a while. But not long enough, so I went back to the car in the devil parking garage for a nap. And guess who left the interior lights on! Ding Ding!! Great...so not only am I out of gas, but now it might not start. I turned it off, waited a bit, prayed, cranked it, let it run, then the car and I both took a little nap. Thank you God.

2:00 I went to pick up the passports to find a line of about 25 people outside the embassy, because you know what? They DON'T close at noon! I didn't have to rush to get there afterall! But the nice guard man did let me go straight back in, and by 3:30 they were finished.

Yay! It worked! Now everyone can get their visas and be in Germany legally. Now only 2 more hurdles to overcome: filling the gas tank and finding my way back to Germany. I had passed a few gas stations on the autobahn on the way into town, but not only did I not know which autobahn I was on since I was just following signs to get to the booming metropolis of Bern, but I came in on a one-way, and I couldn't remember how far away they were. And the car was sputtering. I asked for directions at the embassy, and none of the workers had vehicles and therefore couldn't tell me where one was. Finally, they pulled a man in who gave me directions to an "underground station." What?! I tried to find it, but gave up after a while. Stopped again. And got more directions in French. Ahh! I don't speak French! So a woman hopped in my car and pointed the directions for me to go. I got there; she left. Enter gas station man who filled the tank completely for 89 Swiss Franks (CHF). I had 72 CHF. If this had happened in the States, where I usually felt in control of my life and everything going on around, I would've been mortified. But here, it was a bit humbling, but not too traumatic. I'd never filled the tank before, and didn't know how much it would take. I made a mistake, and won't do it again. He wouldn't take card but unhappily accepted the deficit in Euros.

So with a full gas tank, I ventured back onto the road. It was easy to find Bern; there are signs all the way there from Kandern, and I'd been there before. Unfortunately, there are no signs heralding traffic toward Kandern, Germany. I slept the entire way back from Bern last time I went. And I had neither directions or a map. But, praise the Lord for giving me a decent sense of direction, because I got back to Kandern with no wrong turns (although I questioned myself multiple times).

And thus, concludes my adventure to the embassy in Bern, Switzerland. Michelle was very happy that neither she nor Lane had to go. And I'm happy to have learned the flow of things at the embassy, how to get in and out of parking garages, the hours of the embassy, the procedure of filling up a gas tank, and the overall joy of being a foreigner.

Meet Mardy

Remember my story teaser? Last Sunday I was cleaning through one of the upstairs bedrooms (which I moved into yesterday), and I found this pretty box hidden back in a corner.

And this is what was in the box...

Check out those teeth!
I laughed so hard my stomach was sore the next day. I wanted so badly to share it with someone else who would think it was funny that I got out my BFA phone list and desperately searched for anyone I thought would not be disgusted. I thought maybe a couple of the guys might think it funny, but some of the guys around here are a strange breed and would probably think I was hitting on them or trying to find an excuse to call them. So, I called the girls who just moved out of this apartment and said “you'll never guess what I found in the bedroom!” I don't think they enjoyed it as I'd hoped. Haha, oh well. Maybe someday I will have a friend that I feel comfortable approaching that will enjoy the humor of things like this with me.

This little creature, a Marder, is a wicked thing that sounded like folklore to me until I saw one. These marders love eating insulation and hoses in cars and houses. The way people talked about these mysterious critters that are too fast to be seen or caught-- you can just see their footprints on your car in the morning or hear them running in the walls at night-- seemed a bit made up. People buy expensive "Marder Devices" for their cars to ward them off, spray pepper sprays on felt pads they attach to their cars...all kinds of stuff. But, now, I believe.

So, obviously, I'm not throwing this little guy away. They're too fast to be caught, but I have one in a pretty floral box! The hard work is already done! Some day, some punk high school boy will pull a prank on me, and I will be ready with my retaliation. Katie was not a fan of my keeping him, so I took him to our scary shed.

And now he can be friends with the other things people are scared of that also live in that shed, like Natasha here:

So, now that you've seen what I saw that day and have either laughed with me or are now too disgusted to eat anytime soon knowing that I held a petrified nasty animal, here's the best part. I ran into the family who lived in this apartment before the last pair of girls and told them about it. I was definitely not expecting to hear "we left him there?!?! Honey, Sarah found Mardy!!!!" Elation ensued. WOW. The mother of the family proceeded to tell me that this apartment used to be infested with marders, and just a few years ago the roof was removed and the generations of marders extracted from the walls. They found this petrified one and kept it as a show-and-tell item for the kids. His name is Mardy...and they want him back... to take him to their home in the States. I'd like to see them explain him at customs.

Today's Thoughts

A few things I've pondered today... 1. I wonder if compulsive email checking will be included in the DSM-V? 2. Having a roommate is good practice for a future family. Katie has been asking me to read over some papers for the last week, but it (along with much of my personal life) has consistently taken a backseat to work. Living by myself for the last few years allowed me to be the occasional workaholic, but I can't do that and give enough time to maintaining our home. So, I'm learning a lot about priorities and boundaries. 3. God loves us to love others. I'm working on checking my motives- trying to avoid things of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility considering others before myself and loving. Someone asked me a few days ago if before I came to Germany I'd anticipated it to be a time of healing and significant growth. I never had mentally set this time apart as a special opportunity for Him to do works in me that He wouldn't have done otherwise. But, if things keep progressing how they are now, big things in my heart and life are going to happen while serving at BFA. I'm excited to experience even more of His plan, joy, and peace.

And because today was a workaholic day, I didn't take a picture to go along with that story I left hanging. Maybe tomorrow ;)

Life Soundtrack

I've been working on compiling my life soundtrack for a few years. I think it would be fantastic to have some kind of chip embedded in my head that would track my emotions and play the perfect song to match appropriate moments just like a movie-- Nickelback "Far Away" when being swept off my feet, Norah Jones or Amos Lee when walking through the hills enjoying the breeze by myself, Dane Cook telling the occasional joke, some Mortal Kombat soundtrack when needing to get out some frustration, Panic! at the Disco or Ludo after I realize my eyes have glazed over and I need to wake up, Marc Broussard when walking in the rain, Josh Groban when cleaning the house on Saturday mornings, Slipknot when in a cage fight (I try to be prepared for every situation)...you get the point. But tonight, I've decided that as great as it would be to have my personal soundtrack (with an off switch behind my ear of course), I would settle for Jon McLaughlin following me around with his piano. He is just so talented! It's a shame I made this realization after moving to Germany--I mean, we were living in the same state. We could've had some good times--him melting my heart with every smooth note he sings and me offering nothing but the joy of my company. Sounds fair :)

The past couple days have been the busiest yet at work, but I've also had some great time with friends!! There's not a whole lot I can tell about work that would be interesting to read; as exciting as the ins-and-outs of visa applications are, I'll spare you the details. Last night some RAs came over on their night off, and it was a blasty blast. Sam, Steph, Candy and I got some Asia Wok (yum) and brought it back to my home...dinner on the balcony was nice and great for relaxing after a week full of change for all of us. Then we hiked up to "my" gazebo. I can really only claim it because I live closer to it than any other BFA people, so I get the joy of early morning and late night visits (my 2 favorite city views, sunrise and city lights at night). Then today Nathan and Tim, my saviors of the day, offered a much appreciated break and let me have some good ol dorm food :)

I am very tired right now, but want to give you a story teaser-- Sunday afternoon while working around the house I found a very pretty floral box hidden under some flooring way back in the corner of a room- obviously a special treasure hidden by a child. I'll share what that special treasure is after I take a picture of it tomorrow...

Car, Camping & Chocolate

My new ride!
And this sweet decal action is how you know I bought it in Germany

I miss my family, but I must admit that I'm being pulled into a pretty great family here, too. The Grubbs had me over for dinner this week and listened to me pour out my heart and ask for advice before even the main course. I also had dinner with the Stuckeys. They love themed parties; so this one was a happy birthday to everyone party. We told silly stories on ourselves and had a great time. And the people who I knew would be family once I got here, the Youngs, are in the States this week, so I can't add any dinner stories about them yet...but they furnished most of my apartment! So they're pretty darn great too :)

Another fantastic family is that of the single ladies, especially those of us not in the dorms. I love the RA ladies, but the residence life and teaching/administrative staff are quite separate during the school year, simply because of schedules. That's why I say specifically the non-dorm women. Last night 11 of us went camping, and it was so great to get away for a night and get to know people outside of school. As we were getting ready to go to sleep, sprawled out on the floor in the little hut we stayed in (see photo below), I realized I was the only "new staff member" there and that I felt completely welcome. So, I told them that, and a massive "awwww" followed. Another great family is the young couples- who I've actually spent quite a bit of time with although I don't suppose I fit the defining factor of the group. Tonight I'm having dinner with 5 couples. I'm really glad that they invite me to stuff because they are incredible people, and because (selfishly) I feel like I'm learning a ton about relationships by just being with them and watching them interact. I'm learning what things are helpful within marriages as well as relating to others as a married person and what things aren't...what things show a man that his wife respects him and ways to show a wife love, what questions to ask, how small issues can become bigger if not dealt with, what to do when you're without TV, car, phone, internet, or friends other than your spouse for an extended amount of time...all kinds of good stuff. I used to make jokes about seeing how some of my guy friends treat their wives by saying something like "that's why I'm not married" or "you just convinced me to stay single forever." Looking back I realize how bad that was for me to say (even as a joke) to those guys; I really hope I didn't cause damage. But these new friends are showing me what good, Christ-centered marriages can look like... and how having someone to serve with can be better in some ways.

Having several families with different strengths = answered prayer

Having a car = liberating

Hiking and camping with great friends = the needed break from work to keep me sane (and fun:)

Eating from a never-ending supply of real dark chocolate everyday = divine

And, finally for today, in response to my last post about my desire for a healthy heart, I got several concerned emails from people thinking that I'm having a breakdown or that that post is just a surface explanation of what's "really going on." Let me assure you that I'm not that complex; I say what I mean. No breakdowns or veiled hidden meanings...so if you're one of those people, stop reading between the lines. I want a more compassionate heart. I want to actually get to know people and let them do the same. And, for those of you still trying to read farther into my words, this has nothing to do with a guy--just my wanting more depth.

A Productive Day

Within the last day I've gotten a phone, internet at home, online banking, and bought and insured a car. YaY!!!! These were the things that were overwhelming me, and in a short day, ta-dah! Amen :) So...now I can update my blog and add some pictures.

Yesterday was Opening Ceremony at BFA. The students come from 48 countries. They marched in behind their respective flags, and each country was introduced. It almost moved me to tears just thinking about how big of a thing I'm involved in. My role is small, but this school is so integral to work being done all around the world. I got to meet some students and parents and am excited about getting to know all these new faces!

Right now I'm so ecstatic to have access to the internet that I'm not even sure what to say! So I'll show some pictures...

Me and Steph (my fellow Hoosier) at Hochblauen

Sausenburg Castle ruins (just about 5km from my apartment)

Check out that sky...

Solveig, Rachel, Katie and Me atop Sausenburg

I need to start carrying my camera with me so I can show you guys more of life. It's definitely not all mountaintops and castleviews. The last week has been quite the emotional ride for me. Tonight I was able to articulate my greatest desire right now--to have a fully functioning heart. I feel like most of my heart is encased in a metal shell that has never really been broken into (and keeps people at an arm's distance) but significantly dented from some hammer blows trying to break in; and the nonhardened part is raw and missing large chunks- some given away, some ripped out. So, that's one of my main prayers right now, that God will do what it takes to get my heart to a place where I'm sensitive to Him and to people but still guarding my heart which is the wellspring of life. I've never found this balance, so I don't know what it looks like. I'm really hoping that to get a fully functioning heart that honors Him I don't have to go through total brokenness. But if that's what it takes to be genuine and effective then bring on the tissues. So, here's to a healthy heart!

New School Year

School starts tomorrow! I'm ready for the students to arrive and to see BFA in action. Today was orientation for parents, and I've never been asked so many questions that I don't know the answers too. Questions like, does Air Slovenia fly directly into Frankfurt on any weeknight that will still allow my son to catch a train to Basel? And how much would that cost? I definitely have a lot to learn! But, I know that people must still be praying for me to not be overwhelmed because I'm not. So, thank you! The last week has been an emotional roller coaster, which for any of you that know me well, know that that in and of itself is a stretch! I'm not typically an emotional person, but this last week has brought out quite the gamut in me. I think it's because I've been without my two main emotional releases- sports and singing very loudly while driving. To try and get back into balance I played indoor soccer last night with a bunch of men (yay! for them letting a girl walk on and score some goals), will play volleyball tonight, and am going car shopping tomorrow. Maybe things will be right in my world again :)

Please pray for smooth transitions for the students and the parents that have to leave them, as well as for my quick learning of the job.

Dear Readers

Dear You'enses,

Still no internet at home and the incapability to update the blog from my work computer has made for poor blogging. Sorry! On a happy note though, things are going very well. Right now I'm at one of the dorms and can't particularly concentrate. So a "real" update will come soon.

Home Sweet Home

I will post later to tell you about my trip and getting started here in Germany, but here are some pictures to show you a little of my new life.












This is my home! Above are pictures of the exterior, hallway, and bedroom with all the windows! Below are two of the views from my apartment.